Statistics say that one in five marriages ends in the first years of living together. Interestingly, the percentage decreases after the first decade. At last, the matter of concern is what are the most frequent reasons for divorce and how to prevent them?
1. Infidelity
It is one of the main reasons for divorce among couples. The solution is sincerity, it is necessary to establish pacts and fulfill them.
It is very difficult to trace a relationship after trust is lost. It takes a moment of lucidity to assess whether that tempting moment is worth it. In the case of men (who mostly have sex dissociated from love), the advice seems to be to learn to assess the risk. While infidelity may not mean love, betrayal is probably unforgivable for his wife. According to divorce attorney Stuart, in most cases the infidel ends up desperate for the result of his actions, wishing uselessly to go back time.
In the case of women, infidelity is rarely presented as an isolated or insignificant event, generally ending up falling in love with the lover in question and dissolving the marriage.
2. Boredom
It is very important to have projects together: travel, children, build a house. We must generate activities that can be enjoyed as a couple. This point is as important as respecting the moments of privacy. You should not suffocate the other, balance is essential. Many couples enter into conflict when their children grow up or have already achieved their professional goals. Renewing life, projecting the future and inventing new goals allows invigorating marriage and always have a topic of conversation.
3. Lack of communication
Coexistence, in many reasons for divorce, threatens communication, daily life, responsibilities, children. It is difficult to find the time to speak calmly and the mistake of being left is usually made because ‘total later we will speak it’. When it finally happens, they discover that they are two strangers who have been misinterpreting different situations for years: he would not have cared if you stopped working; in reality, it is distant because since the boys were born it feels abandoned; He did not stop loving you, he is depressed because he is doing badly at work … Thousands of old wounds often turned into deep resentments and impossible to cure. Dialogue is the cornerstone of every union, as important as passion, love or attraction. It is a particularly difficult issue for men who often avoid talking about their feelings. They are not accustomed to doing so and the idea overwhelms them.
4. A weak, extinguished love
It is important not to be late to the rescue of marriage, some couples do not get hurt to avoid conflict. They never argue and shut up, generating an apparent harmony that increasingly widens the distances. Over time, the bond is more fraternal than loving or passionate. That type of union is not enough to sustain a marriage. Inevitably, one of the two will end up causing pain to the other and the couple ends. It is not necessary to be afraid of the differences, to discuss and to confront enriches the relationship, helps to know the other one better and does not have to imply an unpleasant fight. Also, there is nothing more romantic than a reconciliation.
5. End of passion
Great theme: a mystery how it arrives and another how it goes. However, there are many ways to help sustain them over time. It is essential not to be physically, find moments of privacy, be attentive, connected, look for ways to surprise the other.
It is highly recommended to make a romantic trip every so often, even if it is a weekend. Have fun, play and talk. Say what you don’t like and what you do, so you can get to know each other more and more. The secret is to capitalize on the passage of time to explore even the deepest sexuality of the couple. They will discover high compatibility levels, which are only achieved with time and absolute delivery.
6. Intolerance
Accepting is not tolerating. It is lovingly understanding that the other is as it is. Focus on the good and not the bad. As simple as this: see half the full glass. There are no people without defects, starting with ourselves. Timely, grumpy, selfish, greedy, liar, dirty, messy, lazy, obsessive, surely for each of us this list would have a different ranking. It’s about choosing well and never encouraging the crazy idea of getting the other to change, the theory of ‘with me will be different …’ usually ends badly. It is essential to be compromising, the best way to raise a relationship is to be willing to add wills, today for you, tomorrow for me.
7. Incompatibility in living together
In the case of couples who are just started to live together, not to be scared, it is normal to go through a difficult adaptation time. Adjustments have to be made, it is a matter of contemplating and finding ways to respect each other’s limits. It seems a lie, but sometimes it is easier to overcome obstacles like that of an infidelity than issues of annoying daily habits, such as eating breakfast with strong odors, putting the radio at full volume, the toilet lid raised, the toothpaste dripping, the bathroom mirror splashed or wet towels scattered around the house.